A Wedding, Really? Ugh.

[above picture is a 12 oz *Estwing hammer my fiance gave me for Christmas despite our ‘no gifts’ agreement.  He got an excuse to check out tools & I got a Made In USA hammer that’s the perfect size for small projects (prob. why I unconsciously picked it up a dozen times when we were at the hardware store).  I think he wrote my name on it to insure I wouldn’t return it.]

I’m not necessarily a ‘romantic’, but I suppose that depends on what your definition of romance is.  When my fiance suggests we spend a beautiful weekend afternoon trash picking at the flea market, I get giddy & swoon (doesn’t everybody?). I would have a heart attack if he ever gave me a piece of jewelry (family heirloom exceptions of course…) that could equate to something practical – like property taxes, a pick-up truck, a storage shed….

I have never understood weddings as popular culture has them. Where people see beautiful flower arrangements, table settings, & lots of extras, I see an enormous amount of waste – weddings on a ‘budget’ included. I see money that could be a down payment on a house, an emergency fund, or the difference between working a job you hate & one you love (if money that would have been spent on a wedding were invested wisely…). I see the time spent planning a wedding, as time NOT spent building a life with your mate. I could never understand the concept of a wedding – even as a little girl (but I was very much a tomboy – who the heck would want to wear a dress AND a white one at that?).

How about you? Any thoughts? If you’re married, had a wedding celebration with costs, & had to do it all over again, would you?

*note – I have not been compensated by Estwing – I mention them because a lot of their quality products are Made In USA & the above picture represents an Estwing product. Link is for convenience.


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5 Responses to A Wedding, Really? Ugh.

  1. stargazyrr says:

    We just got married in November in our backyard, after buying our house in February 2010. We knowingly put off a wedding until we were in our own home with our own yard or “venue”. A very casual afternoon wedding with a wedding cake I made myself (it was super impressive, too!), along with champagne and various desserts, some of which our relatives made themselves from family recipes. We had close friends serving as our photographer (an amateur trying to turn pro photographer), my make-up artist (which I didn’t really need but it was her gift to me), and even our officiant (a friend who got certified online). All in all, we probably spent maybe $1,500 on our wedding… including all the white serving dishes, plates and utensils we bought to use at future parties and gatherings. My dress was just a long flowy dress with a shrug over it, and my husband wore dress pants, a long-sleeved shirt and a vest. We couldn’t be happier that we didn’t sink lots of money we don’t have into a one-day celebration. And everyone tells us that it was the best and most sincere wedding they’ve ever been to! Go figure. :-)

    • admin says:

      Thanks so much for sharing! I love that you waited for your own ‘venue!’. Your wedding is a perfect example of financial reason when you want to share your day with friends & family (and very similar to what we’ll probably do). Heck, your wedding cost less than the average mortgage payment around here. Even better that your ‘expenses’ were investments in what you would need for your home anyway. I’ve been hearing & seeing examples of ‘budget’ weddings that are still well into the thousands! Of all the weddings I’ve been to, the best & most meaningful was my friends who got married in the grooms parents back yard under a harvest moon. Congratulations!

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  3. Van says:

    WEDDINGS ARE PAINFUL! I would never want to set a date, rent a venue, send out invitations and thank-you cards, find a dress (*shudder*), make a schedule, buy tons of food (*faint*). Way too much work!

    And of course, the money is better spent on your future home or a vacation.

    If I want to be with someone I don’t need a grand ceremony to prove it or celebrate it. I was never a little girl who dreamed of weddings. (I dreamed of being a scientist, single and virginal for all times! Bwahaha! Failed at both.)

  4. Sondra says:

    I AGREE! In some ways, the planning of the wedding is the biggest test of the couple’s relationship. And you will never please everyone. I think eloping is far more romantic but then again, I grew up a tomboy too. A day spent up in a tree was the perfect day for me as a teenager. My in-laws took over almost every piece of the wedding planning and it took us two years to pay it off. It was an awful day and I wish we could go back in time and get a do over. The cake was the highlight. I wish more couples would use that money towards their futures instead of blowing it in a single day.

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